Monday, 3 December 2012


Feelings are a funny thing, one of those things in life that you can love and hate at the same time, that can help and hinder, and in the end, are one of the most important things about a personality.
I felt like writing this post as its relevant at the moment for me. Over the past couple of days, I've been feeling a lot more than usual; for many months now, I've been rather emotionless, not completely, its as if the emotions are still there, but they are just not touching me, not affecting me. This is a surprise to me, as last year, they seemed to affect me much more, which I would generally say is a bad thing, as it makes loneliness an easy to reach feeling.

Lonliness seems to have not reached me, because well, I would say it has been around for a while, but I have just not acknowledged it. Over the last weekend or so, it seems I have picked up on the fact that I am a little lonely, after a friend was mentioning how much loneliness was hurting them. I find it an odd thing, I would expect that I would have felt this a while ago, not now, due to being single since March.

I think It's partially due to the way that I've changed since last year, I've lost some friends, found new ones, but mainly, It's my personal changes that are most important; I feel I've become a much more reclusive person than before, a while back I was very proactive in my social life, and I still am in a way, but mainly with people I'm already good friends with, so yes, I find it harder now to make new friends than I would of in the past.
It can also make you think untrue things, and delusion yourself from your true personal thoughts, thereby possibly making you decide to do something which isn't all that clever or that could have bad reprocussions

To an extent, loneliness doesn't matter, because either you find a way to cancel it out, or you stick through it with head held high and focus upon yourself, not others, which causes loneliness in itself, but then you just ignore it, and don't pine for friendships and the latter.
You just gotta either get off your ass and do something about it (something reasonable), or just sit back deal with it. Frankly both options are hard, but that's life.

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